Potty Training and the Plan of Salvation

I walked in on an interesting conversation tonight between my wife, Lynette, and my three and a half year old, Nathan.
Lynette: "Nathan, just sit on the potty for a second before you get in the tub."
Nathan (without attire): "No."
"You don't have to GO potty, just sit on it for a minute."
"No."
"If you don't like it you can get up, but just sit."
"No."
"Joseph's going to use the big potty. Why don't you sit on the little potty at the same time?"
"No."
"Please?"
"No." (Just as an aside, he gets his stubborness from his mom.)

At this point, I decide I better slip out before I end up in a conversation about why we decided to have a third (due in April). But I wasn't quick enough, and Lynette and I ended up in a long discussion about potty training and ultimately the principle of agency, the ability to choose, while Nathan ran around the bathroom repeating, "I'm getting in the tub. I'm getting in the tub." (An insight into what good kids we were blessed with that while he is too independent to sit on the potty, he is too obedient to get in the tub without Mom telling him it's OK to do so without having sat on the potty like she said.)

As we discussed our next approach (including the merits of tying him to the potty), it was clear to me that while agency is something I want for myself, as a parent I am reluctant to give it very freely. It's a whole lot easier just to tell my kids what to do. It would save everybody a ton of time and pain if my kids would just do what I say instead of wanting to figure stuff out for themselves. I'd have to clean up fewer messes, fix fewer broken things, and apply fewer bandages.

If God reads blogs, He's shaking His head right now.

How many messes of mine has He had to clean up because I'm still learning how to recognize what He already knows would be best for me? How many feelings have I hurt? How many people have needed my help that I have ignored? How many sins have I committed that the Savior has had to suffer for? On a larger scale, how many wars have been fought? How many people have been killed? How may children are abandoned? All because so many people have abused their God-given right to choose.

Wouldn't it have been easier to make us be good? To force us to be kind?

Easier maybe, but not better.

If I make all the decisions for my boys, how will they learn anything other than to resent me? If their only choice is to do what Dad says or be punished, how will they ever learn to choose what's right because it makes them feel good rather than out of fear?

God is perfect and so is His plan for saving us. He knew the only way for us to be like Him as the Savior commanded was for us to learn to use our agency appropriately--to try and sometimes (often) to fail. But that is why the Savior came anyway, to provide a way for us to get back on our feet again after falling down.

So we will continue trying to help Nathan understand how to apply his agency appropriately when it comes to potty training, and God will continue to let us try to figure out how to do that. In the process, hopefully we all learn something about both potty training and God's plan of salvation.

In the Beginning . . .

In the beginning the blog was without form, and void; and blankness was upon the face thereof. And since neither of my brothers wanted to go first, I said, "Here am I." So here I am.

Welcome to Olsondipity, our effort at giving voice to not only the what's in our lives but the why's as well.

Among all the day-to-day events--the humorous and the ho-hum, the exciting and the irritating, the big things and the really not-so-very-big things--we hope to share the experiences that weren't meant just for us. We hope to see the divine within the mundane. We hope to recognize and remember the hand of God, orchestrating the score of our lives.

By so doing, we hope to help keep our friends and family updated not only on what we are doing but what God is doing for us.

As you read our posts, we'd love to hear your thoughts on what God has done for you lately. We hope reading and sharing is worth your time. We know it's already been worth ours.

And this is only just the beginning.